JOIN US AND PROSPER!

Hey assholes, yes you, asshole.. want to become a part of the Nasty Family? I’m looking for some good content authors to help me keep this fucking shit hole updated. Yeah, I’ve been busy and haven’t been fulfilling my Nasty duties so why not join up and help out?  If you want to help contriube to our Nastiness please drop me a line telling me why you think you’d be a good fit for our family and we’ll see if my shoe fits in your ass good enough to bring you on board.

Nasty, Nick’s back and badass as ever. Just thought you should know. -Terry

Ah yeah there’s nothing better than a little Nick Malibu to go with your healthy breakfast of 6 egg whites, some diced red, green peppers, and onion, half a cup of strawberries and 1/2 cup of cottage cheese in the morning. In case you’re wondering I’m back in health mode which is why I’ve been MIA the last week. Health mode and fighting a nasty battle with hemorrhoids that I’m happy to say I’m now winning. It was a close battle there this weekend but thanks to my anal icepack I’m now the victor. Speaking of annoying ass friends, Nick you’re the shit so don’t ever change.  #2 fan, behind Nik of course.

I love Oprah. In fact, I love Oprah so much I’d even sleep with her, for money, a lot of money, and I’d even cum up inside that hot piece of ass. What’s better than Oprah kicking so much ass is she will tear into anyone she feels like it and for any reason. Especially douche lords like Jay Leno. Jay, I really don’t have much to say about you other than your show always has sucked and you’re a douche lord. Let’s face it, the best thing to happen to “The Tonight Show” was to put Conan on it. Oprah, you’re the shit. (I really hope Oprah doesn’t read this and forces me to come on her show to talk about the spooge portion of this post – afterall we are a college humor portal… nah that’d never happen.)

Erica, you have our vote babe. Call me.

“The massive outpouring of support and passion from so many people has been overwhelming. The rallies, the signs, all the goofy, outrageous creativity on the internet, and the fact that people have traveled long distances and camped out all night in the pouring rain to be in our audience, made a sad situation joyous and inspirational.”

“To all the people watching, I can never thank you enough for your kindness to me and I’ll think about it for the rest of my life. All I ask of you is one thing: Please don’t be cynical. I hate cynicism — it’s my least favorite quality and it doesn’t lead anywhere.”

“Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you’re kind, amazing things will happen.”

This was probably one of the best sign offs I’ve ever seen, ever, and probably the best in the history of the world. Conan O’Brien used unthinkable pose to open and close his last airing of “The Tonight Show”, it just doesn’t get any better than that kids.  Conan on a personal note you rock and whatever comes at you next will be great. Thank you for a great 7 months and I’ll see you on Sunday.

Because we just didn’t want you to forget. Kayne is a gay fish.

Oh my god Nasty, have you see Nick Malibu yet? He’s cutting a new album and is going to be the next Emimen, except much gayer. Just thought you’d like to know. – Jay

Ah yes, huge fan. Some of you might remember Nick from here. Nick, your just dreadful. How are you supposed to bust a single to your fans when you can’t even speak right? One word: enun·ci·ate. I will admit watching you is sort of addicting. Seriously, its like driving past a train wreck and you just can’t help but to look at all of the dead body parts lying around and all of the wreckage.

Check out Nick’s YouTube channel. Make sure to point when you laugh.

Oh and Nick, you’re welcome. Hey, negative press is press.

This just in. Our inside sources have presented confidential information exclusively to Mr-Nasty.com that proves Adam Lambert is NOT GAY.

Oh wait. Never mind, the dudes a total fucking faggot. Back to you Tim.

Haiti Earthquake - (c) Getty Images

PORT-AU-PRINCE, Haiti – The most powerful aftershock yet struck Haiti on Wednesday, shaking more rubble from damaged buildings and sending screaming people running into the streets eight days after the country’s capital was devastated by an apocalyptic quake.

The magnitude-6.1 temblor was the largest of more than 40 significant aftershocks that have followed the Jan. 12 quake. The extent of additional damage or injuries was not immediately clear.

Wails of terror rose from frightened survivors as the earth shuddered at 6:03 a.m. U.S. soldiers and tent city refugees alike raced for open ground, and clouds of dust rose in the capital. [1]

Extra extra, read all about it, Haiti got Fucked the Hell UP again.  Although this entire Haiti insanity isn’t really funny you can rest assured that we’re doing our part to help the crisis, just like we did with 9/11.  We have sent a few thousand dollars ($4800.00 to be exact) to the Red Cross relief fund to help relocate those Haitians to the United States to take even more of our jobs and drive up our Taxes. See, it’s the circle of life. Please do your part of the circle by donating some of your hard earned money by clicking the link below.

[1]

My best friend’s sister’s brother’s girlfriend knows this guy who knows this kid that said Colt McCoy is for the gays.  Colt, you’re a faggot, you suck at football and threw the game away against Nebraska who murdered your shitty team. Everyone knows you have NO business being in the national championship game. I’m glad you got hurt.