What what in the butt?  Well today is the last day for those of you here in America who are still working to put in your hard hours prior to your 3 day holiday weekend. Unless you work at Mc.Donald’s, then you’re fucked..  So in celebration of this weekend’s festivities we give to you the morning headlines. Enjoy!

Kissing Cops while a passanger was in the backseat (she looks hot to me)
500k Americans Out of Jobs (that’s 500k people that could be working at Walmart)
Michael Jackson spent $50g / month on drugs (death isn’t cheap)
Jessica Simpson’s Nice Rack (she looks fine to me)
Sears Tower Opens Glass Skywalk (Ferris Eat Your Heart Out)
Ed Hardy Moving Into Michael Jackon’s Chateau (You’re still a FAG Ed)
Obama’s 7 Broken Promises in Record Time (Alex Jones Baby!)
Sexy Catfight, with Sabers (ahhh shit go red!)
Prats Ousted from E! now taking on alternative medias (Alex Jones, twice in one day)